below is Scott's feed back he is very right it needs stronger statements the problem is I'm terrible with writing a concrete thesis statement my brains always allover the place
That was not good. You should have a thesis statement that has three arguments.
As a future elementary school teacher, this journey abroad will help me to give my students an international perspective, enhance my students respect for art, and inspire generations of children.
Never say anything negative about yourself. Sentences like this are bad, "i spend too much time worring that im not going to be a good teacher."
Love you,
Scott
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